…Your sprint planning meeting begins with a condescending description of what The Methodology looks like, and ends with “meet me here at 4PM – you will be assigned tasks and pairs”.
…You switch task management tools every week, never failing to surprise your developers and upper management. (Hint: more tools is not necessarily better. Bugs on the whiteboard, tasks in Excel, projects in TFS, and resource scheduling in a custom tool is confusing.)
…You have a heterogeneous team with young developers and you don’t do code reviews. (And still, you find the audacity to complain about bugs introduced due to lack of experience.)
…You do testing in production. (Oh, I mentioned this one before.)
…You have continuous integration and nightly builds, but the nightly builds never run and the CI build always fails. (“Only these 200 tests keep failing every time” – not an excuse. Commenting out failing tests – not an excuse.)
What do you say, dear readers? What are your favorite “You are not doing agile if…” moments?
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