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Dear Team Lead, You Are Not Doing Agile If… - All Your Base Are Belong To Us

All Your Base Are Belong To Us

Mostly .NET internals and other kinds of gory details

Dear Team Lead, You Are Not Doing Agile If…

…Your sprint planning meeting begins with a condescending description of what The Methodology looks like, and ends with “meet me here at 4PM – you will be assigned tasks and pairs”.

…You switch task management tools every week, never failing to surprise your developers and upper management. (Hint: more tools is not necessarily better. Bugs on the whiteboard, tasks in Excel, projects in TFS, and resource scheduling in a custom tool is confusing.)

…You have a heterogeneous team with young developers and you don’t do code reviews. (And still, you find the audacity to complain about bugs introduced due to lack of experience.)

…You do testing in production. (Oh, I mentioned this one before.)

…You have continuous integration and nightly builds, but the nightly builds never run and the CI build always fails. (“Only these 200 tests keep failing every time” – not an excuse. Commenting out failing tests – not an excuse.)

What do you say, dear readers? What are your favorite “You are not doing agile if…” moments?


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Comments

ripper234 said:

...You find yourself with 30 people in the daily standup, where every one of them only cares about what 0-3 other people have to say, and plays Angry Birds the rest of the DSM.

# August 30, 2011 2:54 PM

Dennis Doomen said:

...You refer to this state of mind as "Doing Agile" rather than "Being Agile"

# August 30, 2011 4:26 PM

ben said:

"Bugs on the whiteboard, tasks in Excel, projects in TFS, and resource scheduling in a custom tool is confusing"

So what tool do you use?

# August 31, 2011 5:40 AM

Sasha Goldshtein said:

@ben - I like TFS (for everything), but I don't mind any other tool as long as I don't have to switch every week or use 5 different tools on the same project.

# August 31, 2011 7:50 AM

ben said:

@sasha  thanks!  That list you had sounds almost exactly like what we were using... right down to the custom resourcing tool!

# August 31, 2011 11:56 AM

Tim said:

Your developers are relieved if the standup is cancelled for the day.

# September 2, 2011 9:13 PM
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