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How do you know when you're being too blunt? - OneMustCode

How do you know when you're being too blunt?

Published 15 November 06 11:42 PM | OneMustCode

(No, I don't have an answer to that question in this post)

"A friend of mine has a problem": he gets too worked out about code. And design. And architecture. "He" usually holds a view about implementation of ideas which is "all or nothing": you either do it right or not at all, which often leads to a heated debate about the smallest of features.

When "he" was a developer - he could live with the fact that sometimes - he is absolutely right and his team leader has a different (and erroneous) point of view which simply overrides his absolutely 100% correct idea.

Since becoming a team leader he has noticed that more often than before - such arguments tend to go his way. Maybe because he has a louder voice?

Now, I don't mind admitting my mistakes. I can easily recall several times that after a discussion was over and everyone calmed down - I've retracted my arguments and conceded the other side's claims. So I'm not a total ***.

But is "putting my foot down" (on sometimes idiotic issues) worth it? There is a definite "loss of prestige" for a team leader when he ends a discussion using his authority. Sometimes it is better to just end the whole bru-ha-ha and get on with our jobs, I know, but when? I think that after we've explained ourselves several times - the argument has reached its peak. People need to absorb.

I ramble. I noticed. Sorry about that.
Also - this post ends midway. I guess I haven't thought about it enough yet. Sucks to be you, ah, readers. :P

Comments

# TrackBack said on November 17, 2006 04:01 PM:
# Tomer Gabelֲœ said on December 14, 2006 03:10 PM:

I would say that this is the sign of an inexperienced team leader. An experienced team leader would listen more than talk, participate in the argument shallowly and then make a decision. I suffer from much the same problem myself - i.e. getting into heated arguments instead of listening and settling on a decision - and I imagine it's mostly due to inexperience and not realizing the depth of the transition from "hardcode programmer" to "not just that."

# Ayende @ Blog said on January 13, 2007 10:17 PM:

How do you know when you're being too blunt?

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